How do you deal with well intentioned people offering advice on how to cure depression?

I find a lot of people offer me advice to help me overcome my severe depression.





It is well intentioned, but I find it a bit annoying because no one really understands the severity of my depression. How can I explain to people that this is more than just feeling a bit down and I can't just 'snap out if it'?How do you deal with well intentioned people offering advice on how to cure depression?
rarely people who don't suffer from depression truly understand it.accept that people are well-intentioned and seek professional treatmentHow do you deal with well intentioned people offering advice on how to cure depression?
personally i just want to snap their little necks.....





people can be soooooooooooooo stupid and hurtful.....





when i had my first miscarriage...people said..you are young you can have another baby... like the baby i lost didn't matter at all... i was like...so what...what if my husband died...would you say...your young, your pretty...you can find another husband???





my now exhusband...three days after the miscarriage...when i was trying to talk to him about it...said...';i'm pretty much over it, how long do you expect me to grieve?'; what a pig loser... i should have left him right then......





i went through severe depression.... i have been through both situational depression (like losing a baby to miscarriage three different times) and i have been through chemical depression... the situational depressions eventually you can get over on your own...it takes time and therapy but you can do it... but chemical depression...well...that takes medications and therapy.... because it is totally different.... you can have every reason in the world to be happy and be so miserable you just wish you would die.....





and people can't understand that.... people who have never been through it.....





there is no way to explain things to such people...they will not ';get it';..... my parents were like..happiness is a choice and even bought me the book by two christian authors who try to explain how happiness is a choice....





well...it isn't always a choice!





you can do things to work on yourself.... you can take medications and go to therapy and do yoga and things like that... when you can find the motivation...because depression saps your motivation.... and then you might feel better.....





but it is certainly not something you can ';snap out of'; or change just by changing your attitude towards life....





i understand the severity of your depression.....


i have been there... i have attempted suicide 4 different times... the first time i was just ten years old.... (yes kids can get depressed too!)





i have some pretty serious mental illnesses....depression being one of them.... and i am lucky enough to have found some support through my husband and children... although even they won't believe or acknowledge how ';sick'; i am.....





i take my medications regularly and do yoga... i do everything i can to try to stay happy.... i read up on books by Thich Nhat Hanh.... like ';No Death, No Fear';.... (because despite being suicidal i have always had a fear of death and what happens afterwards) and ';Peace is Every Step'; and those books have helped me... staying mindfully in the moment and observing each thought and feeling without judgement....helps... it is not easy to learn to do this... but it isn't that difficult either....





good luck to you.... i feel for you and hope that you can get the help you need....
I gotcha girl. I'm coming out of one myself but no one got me there but me! It hurts and it's painful and it's something that a band-aid and a margarita simply won't fix.





I found it easiest to listen to their advice and nod politely then I would retreat to my online life for brutal advice and truth from total strangers. Not even kidding. People in my regular world didn't realize i was in a depression because I found so many outlets online it was like living two separate worlds.





If you need someone to vent on I'm here and can repay the favor -





click your heels three times - redslippers
You can't explain depression to someone who has never experienced severe chronic depression, they have no point of reference. Experts say that exercise will relieve depression so people accept that, after all, they are experts.





Situational depression also does not apply. People can experience severe depression due to something that has happened to them. Situational depression is usually temporary. People who have experience this wonder why we can't get over it, they did.





My life's partner gets depressed occasionally but it's a passing thing. He has lived with me for 10 years, the recipient of all my moods yet he doesn't understand. He thinks that if he can get over it why can't I? Because he loves me he never says this, but I know at times he thinks it.





When someone offers me advice, I accept it graciously because it was meant graciously. They will never understand so why try to explain. If you do try to explain, they will only think you're whining, get over it.





So, we tell each other because we know. We empathize because we also know the pain and feel it. And silly me, I'm sitting here crying.





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Firstly you must be telling them that you are suffering from ';severe depression '; or they would not be offering advice. Without knowing your circumstances I would offer no advice . Just ask yourself, Are you just Bored? are you fully occupied? have you money problems? Why not expand your question to include the REASON you feel depressed ?
If you did not ask for their advice,my response is who asked them...Nobody can really understand you only you,people can empathise but that's all..Try to develop your trust in your own judgements and instinct...If you know what depresses you deal with it,confront your fears...If you dont know work out whats bringing you down and try to deal with it....Do things you really want to do ,live up not down....
if i stop somebody on the street and ask for directions and i get told ';1st exit left at the next roundabout straight through onto the high street keep left then take the next right on through to the next roundabout and exit right'; and i end up on mars i'm still thankful somebody actually went out of their way to try and help me. if your lost your lost your lost, if somebody asks for help and gets sent on a wild goose chase, sometimes its better to chase wild geese than look at a wall.
People who don't understand are ignorant. And most of them mean well. I have a friend that tries to help, but sometimes makes it worse. I tend to tune those people out. I'm not sure if it's right, but it gets me by.
I feel the same way about people in my life who tell me to ';just not think about it and think happy thoughts and you'll be okay!';





Unfortunately, no, it's not that simple and those people do not understand. I've told many before that not until you feel this, and I wish they never will, will they understand how severe depression is. It can overwhelm us and you don't have to do any explaining to anyone about the way you feel. People will always talk and offer their advice and they mean well but they never will understand.





It is annoying but it's something that you just have to get used to and overlook it and not let it get to you. You don't have to explain anything to anyone. Good luck and I hope you feel better.
Yes. Some people are like that!





But, is it really them?





You are focusing on how you feel.


So are they focusing on how they feel.





If you are depressed and insist that they respect you and your feelings isn't there some point at which you should show the same respect to them?





This is a serious question!





They offer help because they do not understand your feelings. And, they feel that your attitude is directed at them. How do you think that leaves them feeling any different than you do?





Your depression keeps you focused on how you feel. Friends expect that you will also want to know how they feel.





Be grateful that you have people interested enough in you to want you to improve.





Just a thought.





http://themeaningisyou.com
i have had this youll find the advice comes from people that have never suffered from depression.i am suffering from depression at the moment and when these people try to tell me to just snap out of it i just walk away other wise i would snap at them. people dont seem to understand everyones depression is different and for different reasons. as long as you have spoke to a doctor and took their advice and you feel ok with what they have said. then you dont have to take advice that you dont want to take.





take care and hope you feel better soon.xx
Don't get me started on this one!! I have sleep problems and have been offered so much advice don't drink caffine after 6, have a milk drink before bed, don't watch TV an hour before bed etc





AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!





The advice is well intentioned as you say but even when I say I have tried everything they still continue.





I have got to the point now where I don't really mention it then there isn't a discussion which ends with me feeling frustrated. Unless someone is suffering from the same thing people just don't understand. xx
You might think you are the only one, but you're not. I have found it rather annoying about people's comments and how they downplay depression.





These people have good intentions, but could never really know what it feels like to never be happy. I don't know what to tell you about explaining it to others. Many of times I have tried to explain to people (including my husband) what it feels like, and they just can't understand.





Just know that you aren't the only one, and if you want to talk to someone that REALLY understands, feel free to email or IM me.
I know how very annoying it is. I have some people that give 'advice' whilst talking over my head.





The best thing you can do is to tell them straight. Say please stop giving that advice, though I know you mean well, it is not helpful and it is starting to get me down. You also wish to explain to them that if you could just 'snap out of it', you would have done so months ago.
tell them to mind their own business nothing bothers me more than when i get pestered no matter what my mood
I either take advice or i don't.


Be polite and explain you are ';taking steps to sort things through which will take time but thankyou for the advice all the same';.